Anatomy of a Tantrum
June 13th 2009 02:59
We've all seen it. An adorable, rosy cheeked toddler dissolved into a mound of quivering, screaming flesh while an embarrassed parent stands by watching helplessly. Meanwhile, every other adult in the vicinity watches as the parent tries in vain to stop the howling of the offended child. If the parent tries to pick up the child to remove them bodily, the child will either:
1. go completely rigid, making moving them difficult, or
2. go completely limp, making moving them difficult, or
3. perform a combination move where they are rigid until they are picked up then go completely limp.
All three tactics are accompanied by screaming that reaches frequencies that make nearby dogs howl in anguish. As an added bonus, some children will kick their feet or bang their heads against the floor.
This is all bad enough when it happens in the privacy of your home but, when you are in public, the eyes of every other adult seem to bore into you. You know that they consider you the worse parent in the world, only a terrible parent could have such an ill behaved, obnoxious brat. Your cheeks redden as you feel the shame of being a pariah. You wonder about the best course of action, how to deal with your child's complete loss of control.
If you are at home, the answer is easy. Take a deep breath and relax. Make sure he or she is safe and can't get hurt if they should flail into a table or some other furniture then wait. Try as much as possible to ignore the behavior.
When you are in public, the best course of action is to remove the child from the immediate area. Take them to the car, let them get settled down.
Be careful with this choice though, I know one set of parents whose 3 year old had a tantrum at the grocery store. As dad carried the screaming child outside, the boy screamed, "You put me down! I want my mommy!" The father was stopped at the door by store employees who wanted to know if he was the child's father.
And all those disapproving strangers? Chances are they are looking on with empathy rather than disdain. Every parent has had a tired, hungry child melt down while waiting in line at the grocery. We've all had a two year old become frustrated because they don't have the language skills to let us know what is wrong.
The good thing about temper tantrums is that children outgrow them. In the meantime, you might want to look at this article from the folks at KidsHealth.org. They have wonderful tips about the causes of tantrums and how to deal with them without losing control yourself.
1. go completely rigid, making moving them difficult, or
2. go completely limp, making moving them difficult, or
3. perform a combination move where they are rigid until they are picked up then go completely limp.
All three tactics are accompanied by screaming that reaches frequencies that make nearby dogs howl in anguish. As an added bonus, some children will kick their feet or bang their heads against the floor.
This is all bad enough when it happens in the privacy of your home but, when you are in public, the eyes of every other adult seem to bore into you. You know that they consider you the worse parent in the world, only a terrible parent could have such an ill behaved, obnoxious brat. Your cheeks redden as you feel the shame of being a pariah. You wonder about the best course of action, how to deal with your child's complete loss of control.
If you are at home, the answer is easy. Take a deep breath and relax. Make sure he or she is safe and can't get hurt if they should flail into a table or some other furniture then wait. Try as much as possible to ignore the behavior.
When you are in public, the best course of action is to remove the child from the immediate area. Take them to the car, let them get settled down.
Be careful with this choice though, I know one set of parents whose 3 year old had a tantrum at the grocery store. As dad carried the screaming child outside, the boy screamed, "You put me down! I want my mommy!" The father was stopped at the door by store employees who wanted to know if he was the child's father.
And all those disapproving strangers? Chances are they are looking on with empathy rather than disdain. Every parent has had a tired, hungry child melt down while waiting in line at the grocery. We've all had a two year old become frustrated because they don't have the language skills to let us know what is wrong.
The good thing about temper tantrums is that children outgrow them. In the meantime, you might want to look at this article from the folks at KidsHealth.org. They have wonderful tips about the causes of tantrums and how to deal with them without losing control yourself.
| 36 |
| Vote |
Subscribe to this blog
