Not Me and I Don't Know
June 15th 2009 15:19
I have two extra children in my house, but they don't count as tax deductions. Both are very quiet, I hardly know they are there until I discover that the milk has been left out. Then, when I ask who forgot to put away the milk, the response is always the same. "Not me." and "I don't know". These twin trouble makers (try saying that fast!) create more havoc than an army of monkeys. And they do it without ever being seen.
I call them twins but really, "Not me" is a bit older. "Not me" started living with us when my oldest daughter was 3. One day, someone had colored a lovely picture of a kitty cat on the wall in the bedroom. When I asked who drew the picture she responded, "Not me, mommy."
So it began. Over time "Not me" has used scissors to trim a doll's hair, put the cat into the swimming pool, and painted a large red heart on the street in front of our house with some paint my husband left unattended. "Not me" is a very busy child.
"Not me" was joined by "I don't know" when my second child learned to talk. "I don't know" usually only makes an appearance when one of them is asked directly.
"Whose turn is it to feed the cat?"
"I don't know."
"Why does the dog have underwear on it's head?"
"I don't know."
"Well who put them there?"
"Not me."
Unlike "Not me", "I don't know" never works alone. "I don't know" needs someone to jump in and take the heat when things get rough. The two mischief makers have done everything from break the front window with a tennis ball to putting a whole bottle of talcum powder on the dog to make her smell better.
I thought that as the children got older, "Not me" and "I don't know" would out live their usefulness and fade away. They make less frequent appearances but they are still with us. Lately though, "I don't know" has morphed into a more modern version of himself. Last night when I asked whose turn it was to set the table, my oldest called from the other room.
"IDK, mom but its not me."
It's good to know some things never change.
I call them twins but really, "Not me" is a bit older. "Not me" started living with us when my oldest daughter was 3. One day, someone had colored a lovely picture of a kitty cat on the wall in the bedroom. When I asked who drew the picture she responded, "Not me, mommy."
So it began. Over time "Not me" has used scissors to trim a doll's hair, put the cat into the swimming pool, and painted a large red heart on the street in front of our house with some paint my husband left unattended. "Not me" is a very busy child.
"Not me" was joined by "I don't know" when my second child learned to talk. "I don't know" usually only makes an appearance when one of them is asked directly.
"Whose turn is it to feed the cat?"
"I don't know."
"Why does the dog have underwear on it's head?"
"I don't know."
"Well who put them there?"
"Not me."
Unlike "Not me", "I don't know" never works alone. "I don't know" needs someone to jump in and take the heat when things get rough. The two mischief makers have done everything from break the front window with a tennis ball to putting a whole bottle of talcum powder on the dog to make her smell better.
I thought that as the children got older, "Not me" and "I don't know" would out live their usefulness and fade away. They make less frequent appearances but they are still with us. Lately though, "I don't know" has morphed into a more modern version of himself. Last night when I asked whose turn it was to set the table, my oldest called from the other room.
"IDK, mom but its not me."
It's good to know some things never change.
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