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Reality Mom - September 2008


As a reality mom, there are many things to take into consideration during the raising of our children. This includes concerns with health, medical issues, and helping our children understand the medical issues of other children.

I was thinking about this in-depth in recent days because, in all honesty, I’m very proud of how all three of my children embrace other children with medical conditions they may never experience themselves during their lifetime.


There are some medical conditions however, like facial tics, I wonder if my children will fully understand. Will they pick on a child who is suffering from facial tics due to some sort of syndrome like Tourette’s? How can I educate them on misunderstood medical conditions they’ll encounter?

The best thing I can think of when it comes to explaining why children suffering from facial tics can’t help what they’re going through is to educate myself as much as possible. Here are some links I’ve been looking at:
· Movement Disorders
· Medline Plus Medical Encyclopedia
· Child Development Institute
· Tourette’s Syndrome Tics
· Facial Tics


When venturing through each of these links, it was easy to see there is a lot of very useful information out there. In the case of the last link, Facial Tics, it is informative and offers treatment options. If you were interested in treatment options, I would recommend visiting Facial Tics for more information and the ability to ask questions.

How do you explain misunderstood medical questions and concerns to your children? Do you find that your children embrace children with unusual medical conditions, or do they seem to fear them? Does your children have a lot of exposure to children with medical conditions?
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Thoughts on Indulgences

September 30th 2008 13:35

Do you feel like you’re indulging too much in “bad” food?

There are days when my children fight me tooth and nail about snacking of fruits, rather than cookies or other types of junk food. This has been confusing me because, typically, all of my kids love choosing healthy food over “junk” food.

This really brought questions to my mind last night when they didn’t want watermelon (yes, they did eat it) and would have rather had something sweet.

Am I giving them too much junk food, or am I not treating them enough? I baked for all of them last Thursday and I have no idea what they eat for treats when they’re gone with their other parents from Friday to Sunday. So, I have no idea if they’re being deprived or if they’re over-indulging.

This is a tough thing to balance when so many households are involved because, the bottom line is, we want our children to be healthy and make good choices.

I’ve talked in the past in this blog about baking once per week and reserving the rest of the week for healthy snacks. Maybe a good balance would be to bake in the middle of the week. That way, if they’re “over indulging” with their other parents or during visits with their grandparents, it won’t have too much of a negative impact on the healthy eating habits we’re trying to instill.

It always amazes me how parents and grandparents aren’t all on the same page when it comes to bring up children to eat right, make good choices, and not stuff themselves until they feel sick. Why do some parents allow this and think it’s okay? Why do some grandparents ignore parents who want them to “behave” when it comes to feeding the kids? I’ll never understand this.

Have you struck a good balance in your home when it comes to treats?
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Put Your Foot Down!

September 30th 2008 12:49

Children are going to rebel. It’s part of life. They’re supposed to do this, especially when they start reaching the age where independence seems more important to them than obedience. This is the natural course of life, so there’s no need fighting it . . . right?

When asked about putting your foot down with your children, as opposed to being lenient which side of the table do you sit on? Do you believe that a child that faces too much discipline and “hawk-eyed” parenting will rebel more? Or do you believe that, if you let things slide, the child is least likely to regress into bad behavior?

This is a subject that is certainly debatable, but there has to be a happy medium for those who are standing on neutral ground and refuse to take sides. The problem? Fear. These parents are afraid to put their foot down in most circumstances ranging from “little” acts of misbehavior to more serious forms of acting out.

Why are parents afraid to put their foot down? This is a question that has been posed in many self-help books, as well as television programming aimed at better parenting tactics. The question remains, though, is there a happy medium? I believe there is, so long as fear is wiped out of the equation. In households where the kids run the show, rather than the parents there is nothing but chaos and havoc.

Be confident in yourself as a reality mom. Don’t be afraid to “run the show” and don’t be afraid to apply disciplinary measures when necessary. It may seem simple enough to read these words; however implementing them in everyday life is a different matter. Seek support from friends and family members whenever possible because, after all, don’t they always say it takes a village to raise a child? Find your village!
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Homework: Encourage Good Study Habits

September 29th 2008 22:38

Right now, my nephew is going through some changes. Changes in his routine, changes in his school, changes in his friends, and changes in his expectations with school top the list. It’s an upward battle, but worth every bit of the struggle. Why? It’s important to encourage these positive changes, so we’re not giving up.

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Early to Rise?

September 29th 2008 22:16

Lately that phrase, early to rise, has been the exact opposite of my abilities. I’ve been struggling to get out of bed every morning despite sleeping like a rock at night. It’s very strange. Usually, I’m “up and at ‘em” in the morning and raring to go throughout he day.

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Have Fun, Forgo Homework Hazards

September 25th 2008 12:28

Can homework really be fun for a high school student? Is it possible to have a day without dread, fighting, and assignment avoidance? Will there be a time when smiles, rather than frowns, appear when the word homework is uttered?

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Have you ever noticed how stifled communication can be when dealing with a blended family? Particularly when it comes to involving the “other parents” in school activities, events, and meetings?

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In this day and age, it’s a no-brainer that a high school diploma just doesn’t cut it in the workplace the way it used to when we were teen. Now, a college degree is required for just about every decent paying job unless, of course, you have ten years to spare working up the cooperate latter.

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Being a work at home mom does have many benefits. However, the housework tends to scream in my ear throughout the day. And, if I don’t tend to things immediately, I’m too tired or distracted to work on them at the end of the day. So, what’s the work at home mother to do?

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After School Craft Projects

September 23rd 2008 15:14

The kids and I are going to be working on some “harvest” craft projects after school today. While waiting for prescriptions to be filled at the drug store, I found some really cute items to create with:
· Foam pumpkins (there’s six in the package, so each of them can work on two


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Homework Frustrations

September 22nd 2008 21:36

This past weekend has, without a doubt, posed the most homework frustrations so far this school year. I am trying to find the balance between hounding my nephew about every assignment he has, and letting him handle things on his own.

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Soccer Mom

September 22nd 2008 20:39

This week, we will be back on the field! I became a soccer mom two years ago and, for this gal who never participated in any sport willingly in school, the label feels a bit odd. Our children love the experience, though, so I’m on board!

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Books: Researching Life’s New Challenges

September 19th 2008 13:01

In an effort to further help my nephews through his various struggles, I have some books in my arsenal:
How to Help Your Child with Homework: The Complete Guide to Encourage Good Study Habits and Ending the Homework Wars, by Jeanne Shay Schumm, Ph.D.: I purchased this book because he’s never really been pushed to do homework, make an effort, or stay on task before. He’s gotten used to lying about if he has assignments due, getting away with “forgetting” the details of assignments, and not studying for tests. So, I need to learn how to break these bad habits in a healthy, non-threatening manner


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Simple Act of Self-Care

September 18th 2008 14:33

I know that it’s pretty simple to know you must take care of yourself in order to be the best you can be from day to day. How many moms really do that, though? Think about this seriously before answering.

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Open House Tonight!

September 18th 2008 12:06

We have open house at our three youngest children’s school tonight. I love meeting with the teachers, seeing their desk, looking at the various things in the classrooms, and seeing them interact with friends. It’s always such a positive time.

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Art Journaling With the Kids

September 17th 2008 13:09

Yesterday’s art project went extremely well. My children loved the project so much they didn’t want it to end. That’s a success story in itself. They also loved that fact that I was right there creating with them.

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My guilt-riddled mind searched for an answer quickly when my youngest son asked, “Mommy, when are we going to do an art project again,” this morning. OH NO! We used to work on art projects daily around here, but there’s been so much going on . . . that it hasn’t happened . . . in weeks.

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One Gets Sick, We ALL Get Sick!

September 15th 2008 15:31

So, it’s that time of year . . . when the domino effect takes over our household when it comes to sicknesses traveling through the school system. Germs. Viruses. Air-born what-not. Ick. You just have to love it when that happens . . . (sighs)

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Would You LIke to be Quoted in My Book?

September 14th 2008 18:17

I'm writing The WonderDads Handbook for Raising a Girl Ages 0-10: A Month-by-Month Look at What to Expect, Developmental Tips, and Ideas For Activities. This book is going to be broken down into years, and then further broken down into months (bite-sized bits easily ingested by fly-by reader dads).

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Meal Planning Help

September 14th 2008 16:05

I need some serious help with meal planning. I know I’ve discussed this before, but I didn’t really dig down deep into the heart of the matter. We’re a big family and, on some days, there are six of us to feed (these days come along more often than not). So, I have to be prepared.

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Being Pulled Into Two Directions

September 13th 2008 16:43

What do you do when you are being pulled into two directions during conflict? Person A wants you to side with them, and Person B does as well. You have dedication to the both of them, but the both of them are on opposing sides. What do you do?

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I Need Mommy Motivation Today!

September 12th 2008 14:46

My motivation is waning this morning. By this time yesterday, nearly half of my to-do list was completed. Today, this plan was squelched by a trip out of town to run errands. It’s days like today when I wish we didn’t live in the middle of nowhere. (Despite the fact that I love the quiet and how “safe” it feels.)

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Your Kids Aren’t Going to Tell

September 11th 2008 12:20

Don’t let the title of this blog post fool you. When I say your kids aren’t going to tell, I’m not talking about tattling. Your kids will always do that. I think adults still do that in a lot of cases, too, but that’s another blog post for another day.

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Sick Days = Make-up Work

September 10th 2008 12:23

Hubby2b’s nephew has been out of school sick with the flu since yesterday. Turns out, he caught it from his stepbrother and now his mother is also sick. It’s going to be a long week for the three of them if measures aren’t taken toward wellness immediately.

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Our Blended Family

September 5th 2008 12:33

I’m constantly asked, “what it like in your household with all the kids coming and going all the time?” Well, before getting into that, here’s how our family is defined:
· I have two sons, ages six and eight


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New Routines Are Challenging

September 4th 2008 14:40

Okay, so we’re a family of constant transition. We’re a blended family, so my step-daughter (age 7) visits with her mom on the weekends and two my sons (ages 6 and 8) visit with their dad periodically as well. My nephew (age 15) is here for about 70% of his time off from school during the week, and visits with his mom on the weekends.

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It’s Oddly Quiet in Here

September 2nd 2008 13:21

The house is empty and I know it’ll stay this way until 2:45pm this afternoon. I know this time of year is going to happen for the next twelve years, but it still feels odd . . . the kids are all at school, hubby2b is at work, and I’m here clicking away on my word processor. It feels odd.

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First Day of School, and Work

September 2nd 2008 00:26

Tomorrow, my children return to school. We have one first grader, and two second graders who are eager to get their pencils going and their minds working. Our youngest is anxious to show his teacher he can read Dick and Jane stories with no help, and the other two are looking forward to getting to know their new teachers.

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